So I guess this is my job now?
When I accepted what I thought to be my dream job in early 2022, I had visions of making a real difference for a company that had made a real difference in my life. And today — about 18 months and many, many many managers and updates to that job later — I spent nearly an entire day chasing down product license renewals, updating budgets, and figuring out how I’m going to make sense of yet another reorg and a team that continues to grow despite me still technically being classified as an individual contributor. And, honestly, through it all, I felt a bit worthless.
Undeniably, I remain appreciative that I am employed, considering the unfortunate fate of many of my past colleagues. Nevertheless, I find myself pondering, "Is this the extent of it? Is this my purpose now? Is this the path I'm destined to tread?" I'm uncertain about my indispensability to the team, and if I am indeed needed, I question whether I'm content with this role. Will it provide me with fulfillment, or is it time for me to transition from pursuing conventional rewards and job-related connections, and rather accept my role for what it is?
I miss solving problems. I miss making a difference. I miss providing value beyond just saving a few bucks for the business.
The pivotal question I must answer for myself is, what am I going to do about it — if anything? Or is this just my job now?